What Makes Violence Funny in Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Brusque answer to Crowning Moment of Funny for Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

THE WHOLE MOVIE .

Actually, it's a Crowning Movie of Funny.

Long answer:

• The opening credits with inserted subtitles. The subtitles in false Swedish have nothing to do with the movie or the credits at all.
  • The opening film as well. Back when the movie was offset released, information technology was a fairly mutual mistake by the cinemas to put in the wrong film and roll information technology anyway, since the audition had paid to encounter a motion picture. Here came this picture show that did it on purpose and people found it hilarious.
  • A average disclaimer assuring the audition that This Is a Piece of work of Fiction ends with "Signed Richard M. Nixon."
  • "A møøse once bit my sister."
  • The producers halt the credits in guild to get rid of the Swedish subtitlers... only to have the second squad of credit-makers still captivate over moose being in the film. THAT team gets sacked, with a 3rd team of credit-makers hired on from some South American firm... that quickly inserts llamas into the credits. Somehow, this is ignored... or more likely the producers just gave upwardly at that indicate.

    We repent for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible take been sacked.
    (After the moose non-sequitur continues) We repent over again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who take just been sacked have been sacked.
    (Afterwards it still continues) The directors of the firm hired to proceed the credits later on the other people had been sacked, wish it to exist known that they accept but been sacked. The credits have been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute.

  • They and so state that, short on time and due to the lack of decent credits, the producers volition insert their ain cheap, last-minute credits. What follows is an epilepsy-inducing nightmare. Filled with llamas and Mexican music. It's quite obvious that the film makers just gave up at this point.
  • "Mynd yous, møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti..."
  • There'due south too the fact they used the word "sacked." Information technology's supposed to mean they were fired, but there's something funny about imagining all of the incompetent people responsible for the credits being tackled similar football players.
  • I last note, considering the credit-makers were all sacked the catastrophe credits didn't exist.
• The very first scene later on the credits. A sound of horses... followed past ane guy pantomiming horse riding while another behind him claps coconut halves together.
  • And and so that is followed by Arthur trying to get a castle guard to let him speak to the castle's master, which starts with the guard lampshading the presence of the aforementioned coconut halves in medieval England. Which and so shifts to the commencement baby-sit and some other guard getting into a Seinfeldian Chat about swallows and their carrying capacity, at which point Arthur but gives up and leaves. Really sets the tone for the movie.

    Guard one: Where'd you get the coconuts?
    Arthur: We found them.
    Baby-sit 1: Found them? In Mercia? The kokosnoot'due south tropical!
    Arthur: What exercise you mean?
    Guard 1: Well, this is a temperate zone!
    Arthur: The eat may fly south with the sun, or the firm martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our state!
    Guard 1: ...Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
    Arthur: Non at all! They could be carried!
    Baby-sit 1: What? A swallow carrying a kokosnoot?!
    Arthur: It could grip information technology by the husk!
    Guard 1: It'southward non a question of where it grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could non conduct a 1 pound coconut!
    Arthur: Well, it doesn't matter! Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the court of Camelot is here?
    Guard 1: [is silent for a moment] Listen, in lodge to maintain airspeed velocity, a swallow needs to crush its wings forty-3 times every second, right?
    Arthur: [exasperatedly] Delight!
    Guard 1: Am I right?
    Arthur: I'm not interested!
    Guard 2: [interjecting] It could be carried by an African swallow!
    Guard i: Oh, yeah, an African swallow, maybe, but not a European swallow, that's my bespeak.
    Guard 2: Oh, yeah, I hold with that.

• The entire "Bring out your dead!" sequence...

  Peasant: [carrying an onetime, apparently not-dead man] Here's ane!
  Expressionless Collector: Nine pence.
  Old Homo: I'm not dead!
  Dead Collector: What?
  Peasant: Nothing! Here'south your nine pence.
  Old Homo: I'm not expressionless!
  Dead Collector: Ere, he says he's non expressionless.
  Peasant: Yeah, he is.
  One-time Man: I'm not!
  Dead Collector: He isn't.
  Peasant: Well, he will be before long, he'south very ill.
  Old Man: I'm getting improve!
  Peasant: No, you're not, you lot'll be stone dead in a moment!
  Dead Collector: Oh, I can't have him similar that; it's against regulations.
  Old Homo: I don't want to go in the cart!
  Peasant: [to the one-time man] Oh, don't be such a baby!
  Dead Collector: I tin't take him...
  Old Man: I feel fine!
  Peasant: Oh, do us a favor...
  Dead Collector: I can't.
  Peasant: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't exist long.
  Expressionless Collector: Naaah, I got to proceed to the Robinsons. They've lost nine today.
  Peasant: Well, when is your next round?
  Dead Collector: Th.
  Old Man: I remember I'll go for a walk!
  Peasant: [to the old human] You're not fooling anyone y'know. [to the dead collector] Look, isn't there something you can do?
  Old Man: ♪I feel happy... I feel happy!♪
  [the dead collector takes a quick look around and then whacks the old man on the head with his club]
  Peasant: [loading the now dead old man on the cart] Ah, thanks very much.
  Dead Collector: Non at all. Run into you on Thursday.

  • As Arthur rides disdainfully by...

    Peasant: Who's that and then?
    Dead Collector: I dunno, must be a king.
    Peasant: Why?
    Dead Collector: He hasn't got shit all over him.

  • And then the French dump crap all over him near the finish. Literal crap.
• In the scene with the monks striking their faces with the tablets, there's one who'south way too early. Sentry him after and it is obvious the actor's trying not to screw up again by waiting for everyone else to hit first. Starts hither at :22 on the right, second to last guy.
  • On the same hit equally the guy that goes too early on, the i in front of him stumbles. Hitting yourself in the head a few dozen times will do that.
  • The chanting is a standard funeral rite meaning roughly "Merciful Lord Jesus, grant them remainder." In context, though, you could interpret it as "Jesus Christ, make information technology end!" Or "honey God, requite them a interruption."
• Dennis the anarcho-syndicalist peasant taking apart the legend of the Lady of the Lake and Excalibur, to the increasing annoyance of Arthur:

  King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bust of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to deport Excalibur. THAT is why I am your rex.
  Dennis: Heed, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of authorities. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony!
  King Arthur: Be quiet!
  Dennis: Oh, just you lot can't look to wield supreme executive power but because some watery tart threw a sword at you lot!
  King Arthur: Shut up!
  Dennis: If I went 'round sayin' I was an emperor, just considering some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!

  • Even when Arthur finally loses information technology and starts to drag him off, Dennis notwithstanding won't close up. "Come and come across the violence Inherent in the System! Help, assist, I'1000 being repressed!"
  • "Bloody peasant!"
• Arthur's duel with the Black Knight, who keeps getting his limbs cut off and so acting as if nothing bad happened to him.

  Male monarch Arthur: "A scratch?! Your arm'southward off!"

  Blackness Knight: "No, it isn't."

  Male monarch Arthur: [points at his severed arm] "Well, what's that then?"

  Rex Arthur: "Y'all liar!"

  Blackness Knight: "Come up on, yous pansy!"

  • Subsequently Arthur cuts off both arms the Black Knight refuses to acknowledge defeat and kicks Arthur in the face to Arthur'due south shock.

  King Arthur: "Look, y'all stupid bounder, you've got no arms left!"
  Black Knight: "Yes I accept."

  • Even after losing a leg, he King Arthur can't seem to intimidate the Black Knight.

  Black Knight: "Right! I'll do you for that!"

  King Arthur: [passionately exasperated] "Y'all'll WHAT? "

  Black Knight: "Come here!"

  King Arthur: "What are yous gonna practice, bleed on me?"

  Blackness Knight: " I'G INVINCIBLE! "

  King Arthur: "Yous're a loony."

  Black Knight: "The Black Knight always triumphs! Have AT Y'all!''' Come on and then."

  • Finally rid of all of his limbs, the Black Knight admits to calling it a draw as Arthur moves on...

  Blackness Knight: "Ooh, ooh, I come across, running abroad, eh? YOU YELLOW BASTARDS!! Come back here and have what'due south coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!!"

  • And before that, the Green Knight attempting to have downwards the Black Knight with his sword, and so a flail, then a battle-axe. The starting time two are straightforward attempts, but and so the Green Knight merely resorts to running at the Black Knight screaming and holding his axe above his head. The Blackness Knight merely throws his claymore and stabs the poor guy through his helmet.
  • Neither of them really embrace themselves with glory, either. The entire fight feels one stumble away from devolving into complete flailing, which but becomes even funnier when contrasted with Arthur's effortless dismantling of the Blackness Knight.
• The "burn the witch" scene.

  Sir Bedevere: What makes you lot think she's a witch?
  Peasant three: Well, she turned me into a newt!
  Sir Bedevere: A newt?
  (beat)
  Peasant iii: I got amend...
  Crowd: Fire HER Anyhow!

  • Bedevere tries to reason with the mob with some bizarre scientific discipline:

    Bedevere: What else do we burn down autonomously from witches?
    Villager one: MORE witches!
    Villager 2: (nudges him) Shh!
    Villager 3: Wood!
    Bedevere: So, why exercise witches fire?
    (very, very long pause while the villagers think)
    Villager 2: 'Cause they're fabricated of... wood?

  • During the long intermission Eric Idle suddenly starts biting downwards on his scythe; he was that close to losing it entirely.
  • Afterward being put to Bedevere's examination — which is weighing her against a duck, because if witches float, they must be made of wood; woods and ducks both float, and and then must weigh the same — and failing — thanks to a hilariously off-rest scale — the "witch" grumbles:
• The Camelot Song
  • "... On second thought, let's non go to Camelot. Information technology is a featherbrained place."

• When Rex Arthur meets God.
  • Firstly, God's a picture of Due west.1000. Grace. ◊

    God: Oh, don't grovel! One thing I tin can't stand up, it'southward people grovelling...
    Arthur: Sad.
    God: AND DON'T Apologize!! Every time I attempt to talk to someone it'due south "sorry" this and "forgive me" that and "I'one thousand non worthy"... WHAT ARE YOU DOING Now!?
    Arthur: I'm averting my optics, O Lord!
    God: Well, don't! Information technology'due south like those miserable Psalms, (eyes rolling) they're then depressing. At present, knock information technology off!

  • Then...

    God: Arthur, King of the Britons, your Knights of the Round Table shall take a task to make them an case in these dark times.
    Arthur: Proficient thought, O Lord!
    God: 'Class IT'S A GOOD IDEA!

• Whatsoever appearance of the French.
  • "I told them we've already got one."
  • "I'1000 French! Why do you recall I take zis outRAEgous aczent, y'all silly kin-gu?" "What are you doing in England?" "MIND YOUR OWN BIZNESS!"

    French Guard: You lot don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a light-headed person! I blow my nose at you lot so-chosen Arthur Male monarch! You all your silly English k-nnnnni-gits! (blows raspberies while tapping the meridian of his helmet)
    Sir Galahad: What a strange person.
    Arthur: Now, look here, my expert human—
    French Guard: I don't wanna talk to you no more, you light-headed beast food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your female parent was a 'amster and your father smelt of elderberries!
    Sir Galahad: Is there someone else up there that we could talk to?
    French Guard: No! Now go away or I Shall Taunt You a second time!

  • The French bombarding Arthur and his men with livestock. "Fetchez la vache!"
  • "AND THIS ONE IS FOR YOUR Female parent!" [throws duck]
• The failed attempt at entering the French castle in a "Trojan Rabbit", particularly Sir Bedevere's reaction upon realising the trouble (hint: he'south supposed to be in the rabbit at the fourth dimension). "I... uh... await, if nosotros built this big wooden badger..."
  • The French promptly catapult the rabbit back out and it lands on a coconut-carrying squire.
  • Something you may not notice at first is that French Guard and his friends are investigating the "Trojan Rabbit," the Guard's friends don't seem to sympathize him until he repeats what he says in English language. Apparently some of the "French" guards don't even speak French.
• The song by Sir Robin'southward minstrels, by the end of which Sir Robin is looking rather uncomfortable:

  Minstrel: (singing) ♪ Bravely bold Sir Robin
  Rode along from Camelot.
  He was not afraid to die,
  O brave Sir Robin.
  He was not at all agape
  To be killed in nasty ways.
  Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin.

  His head smashed in
  And his eye cut out
  And his liver removed
  And his bowels unplugged
  And his nostrils raped
  And his bottom burnt off
  And his penis... ♪
  Sir Robin: (interrupting) That'due south...! That's, uh... That'south enough music for now, lads. There's muddy work afoot.

  • "Brave Sir Robin ran abroad!"
    • "I didn't!"
  • The particular that Sir Robin's shield bears the obvious insignia of a chicken is a prissy touch.
• "We are the Knights who say... Ni!"
  • "We want... a shrubbery!" [Scare Chord]
  • "...Then, yous must chop downwardly the tallest tree in the forest. WIIIIIIIITH...A HERRING!" [Scare Chord]
  • "Oh delight."
  • The completely serious way Eric Idle declares himself to be "A Shrubber. I design, adapt and sell shrubberies." As if this was ever a existent profession or guild. He fifty-fifty sports tiny bushes as club markings on his clothes!

  Roger the Shrubber: Are yous saying 'ni' to that quondam woman?...Ah what sad times are these when passing ruffians tin say 'ni' at will to former ladies.

• The Tale of Sir Galahad.
  • Galahad the Chaste meets the maidens of Castle Anthrax. He gets more and more uncomfortable until Zute insists he sees the doctor, at which he promptly tries to go away.
    • The doctors are another 2 very immature maidens.

      Sir Galahad: They're doctors?!
      Zute: (evasively) They have a basic medical training. (to the girls) Dr. Piglet, Dr. Winston, practice your art.

    • Galahad wants to face the peril...of spanking and oral sex.

      Lancelot: We were in the nick of time! You were in great peril.
      Galahad: I don't think I was.
      Lancelot: Yes yous were, you lot were in terrible peril!
      Galahad: Look, allow me go back in there and face the peril.
      Lancelot: No, information technology's too perilous.
      Galahad: Merely it's my duty as a knight to sample as much peril as I can!
      Lancelot: No, nosotros've got to find the Holy Grail. Come on!
      Galahad: Oh, allow me have merely a little bit of peril?
      Lancelot: No. Information technology's unhealthy.
      Galahad: ...Bet y'all're gay.
      Lancelot: Am not!

    • The script chosen for Galahad to requite Lancelot a "knowing look".
    • There were only a hundred-and-fifty of them.
    • And they hadn't a chance.
    • "Do you think this scene should take been cut? We were so worried when the boys were writing it. Merely at present we're glad! It'southward meliorate than some of the previous scenes, I recall."

      Three-headed Knight: At to the lowest degree ours was ameliorate visually.
      Dennis the Peasant: At least ours was committed and wasn't just a string of pussy jokes.
      Old Man from Scene 24: Get on with it.
      Tim the Enchanter: Yep, get on with it!
      Ground forces of Knights: Yep, Become ON WITH IT!
      Dingo: Oh, I am enjoying this scene.
      God: Go ON WITH IT!

    • And in the theatrical release, that bit of the scene WAS cut.
• All of Sir Lancelot's Quest. No really, all of information technology.
  • [Arrow hits his squire through the breast] "Message for you, sir!"
  • "1 mean solar day, lad, all of this will be yours!" "What, the curtains?" "No, not the curtains, lad! All that you can SEE!"
  • "Just mother..." "Father, lad! I'm father!"
  • "Heed, lad. I congenital this kingdom up from goose egg! When I started here, aaall there was was swamp! Other kings said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp. (beat) But I congenital it all the same! Just to show 'em! It-sank-into-the-swamp, SO! ... I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. Then I built a third 1. That burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp! But the 4th one... Stayed up! And that'due south what you're gonna get, lad! The strongest castle in these isles!"
  • "But I don't desire whatever of that... I'd rather..." "Rather what?!" "I'd rather... Merely... Sing!" "Stop that! Terminate that! You're not goin' into a song while I'm here!"
  • "Mind, Alice!" "Herbert..." "Herbert."
  • "DON'T Similar HER?! What's wrong with her?! She'due south - beautiful! She's - rich! She's got huuuuuge... tracts of land!"
  • The defoliation with the ii guards, one of whom has hiccups.
  • Lancelot running towards the castle with dramatic music, merely making no basis. They cut between him and the guards watching five times before he suddenly gets there.
  • "A-HAAA!"
    • The guard'southward mildly worried "Hey" afterwards Lancelot murders his fellow guard.
  • The Binge of Sir Lancelot.
  • On his style up the stairs, he stops to chop a bouquet of flowers before proceeding with the slaughter.
  • "You got my annotation!" "Well, uh... I got a note..."
  • "He's come to rescue me!" "Well, let'southward not bound to conclusions..."
  • "You see, I thought your son was a lady..." "Well, I can understand that!"
  • "You merely killed the helpmate'due south begetter, that'south all!"
  • "Well, I actually didn't mean to..."
  • "Didn't mean to? You put your sword right through his caput!"
  • "Oh dear... Is he alright?"
  • "There HE IS!" "Oh, bloody hell..." (massacre re-ensues)
  • "He killed my auntie!" "Now then, now then, this is supposed to be an 'appy occasion! Allow's not bicker and argue about 'oo killed oo'!"
  • Lancelot going out of his way to kill people on his second trip up the stairs.
• This:

  "There, they met sir Lancelot and Sir Galahad. And there was much rejoicing."
  "Yaaaay..."
  "In the frozen land of Nador, they were forced to consume Robin'south minstrels. And in that location was much rejoicing."
  "Yaaaay..."

  • Bonus: the "Yaaaay" for eating Robin's minstrels was a bit less Apartment Joy than the i for meeting Lancelot and Galahad.
• Tim the Enchanter hyping up the Brute of Caerbannog:
• The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog.
  • "What, behind the rabbit?" "It is the rabbit."
  • This piffling commutation after they see the rabbit is just wonderful:

    Tim: Look, that rabbit's got a fell streak a mile wide! It'southward a killer!
    Sir Galahad: Get stuffed!
    Tim: He'll do y'all upward a treat, mate!
    Sir Galahad: Oh aye?
    Sir Robin: You manky Scots git!
    Tim: [thoroughly offended] I'Thou Warning YOU!

  • "JEEZUS CHRYST!!!"

    Tim: I warned you!
    Sir Robin: Ooh. I've washed it once more...
    Tim: I warned yous, but did you mind to me? Oh, no, you knew information technology all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless piffling bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them, simply exercise they listen to me?
    Arthur: Oh, SHUT UP!

    • "RUN Away!"
    • Sir Robin on the ground with his shield up while getting away from the Rabbit is the aforementioned every bit his pictures in the volume earlier in the motion picture.
  • "O Lord, anoint this thy Holy Hand Grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy..."
    • "And the people did banquet upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and big chu..."

      "Skip a chip, brother."

  • "Three is the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. One thousand shall non count four. Nor shall though count two unless thou and then proceed to iii. 5 is right out!"
  • "...who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff information technology."
• The cavern containing the last words of Joseph of Arimathea:

  Brother Maynard: 'Here may be constitute the last words of Joseph of Arimathea. He who is valiant and pure of spirit may find the Holy Grail in the Castle of (puts on a pained confront and voice) aaarrrrggh...'.

  Arthur: What?

  Brother Maynard: 'The Castle of...aaaaaargh.'

  Bedevere: What is that?

  Brother Maynard: He must've died while carving it.

  Launcelot: Oh come on!

  Brother Maynard: Well, that's what it says.

  Male monarch Arthur: If he was dying, he wouldn't carp to carve "Aaaarrrgh"! He'd simply say it!

  Sir Galahad: Perhaps he was dictating.

  King Arthur: Oh, shut up!

• All leading, of course, to the dramatic entrance of the legendary Black Animate being of AAAAARRRRRRGGGHHH!
  • The animator abruptly having a heart set on mid-chase scene. "The cartoon peril was no more than."
  • Made funnier in the DVD commentary, where immediately after this happens, you tin can hear John Cleese going, "Oh, god! So young, too!"
• The Bridge of Expiry, where the Knights must answer three questions from an former homo to be allowed to cross or be plunged into the Gorge of Eternal Peril.
  • Afterward Lancelot is given really like shooting fish in a barrel questions (name, quest, and favorite colour), Robin decides that answering the questions volition exist no trouble for him, only for the bridgekeeper to throw a curveball with the third question. ^notation Not only would that be unexpected, information technology would exist impossible. Assyria has had multiple capitals and wasn't even a country during the movie'south supposed time frame.

    Bridgekeeper: What... is the capital of Assyria?
    Robin: (beat) ...I don't know that! [ejected into the Gorge of Eternal Peril]

  • Next is Galahad, who gets the same three easy questions as Lancelot did, but he even so manages to screw up in one case he hits the third.
  • Then comes Male monarch Arthur'south try, who turns the tables on the bridgekeeper in a hilarious way.

    Bridgekeeper: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen consume?
    Male monarch Arthur: What do yous mean? An African or European swallow?
    Bridgekeeper: (beat) Huh? ...I- I don't know that! [ejected into the chasm]
    Bedevere: How practise you know and so much near swallows?
    Rex Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you're a rex, you know.

• The Ending, in which Arthur and Bedevere are arrested by modern-twenty-four hours law officers.
• The Trailer.

  Narrator: In one case in a life time, in that location comes a move picture, which changes the whole history of the move moving-picture show. A picture so stunning in its effect, and then vast in its impact, that it greatly touch the lives of all who see information technology. One, such equally—(music abruptly stops)
  Managing director: There you go! Cheers, thank you. Next, delight! (trailer rewinds)
  Narrator #2: (with fifty-fifty heavier accent) One time, in a, lifetime, there comes a mo-tion movie, which, changes the who-le, history of mo-tion motion picture. A—(music abruptly stops)
  Director: Yes, thank you. Side by side! (trailer rewinds)
  Gumby Narrator: ONCE! IN! A LIFETIME!!--(music abruptly stops)
  Managing director: Go away!
  Gumby Narrator: What!?
  Managing director: Next!
  Gumby Narrator: (mumbling) What's wrong with my voice? My voice is alright, my brain is hurting...
  Chinese Narrator: (in Chinese) Once in a life time, there comes a motion picture, which changes the whole history of the movement movie.
  Director: That'south more than like it!
  Chinese Narrator: (in Chinese) One such motion-picture show is Kurosawa'southward Seven Samurai... Another is Ivan the Terrible. So there are more run-in-the-factory films like... Herbie Rides Again... La Notte... and Monty Python and the Holy Grail (the Camelot model collapses, Arthur and then stabs the knight he only anointed to death). Information technology has some quite funny moments... a fairly exciting story... and some low-upkeep adventure... Simply compared to something like Ingmar Bergman'south The Seventh Seal... Information technology'south all rather empty-headed. Then if you're an intellectual midget... and you like giggling... you could do worse than run into... Monty Python and the Holy Grail! (switch to a fancy Chinese restaurant) And come accept a repast hither afterwards.
  Subtitle: MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL. Merely iv minutes from this restaurant.

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Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail

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